So Seriously Single

Who said I needed change?!

2010-05-31T21:52:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, last Friday was my last day at my beloved elementary school that I've been teaching at for 3 years! Those three years have been filled with a ton of memories and I wish that I could pack up everything about my school - even the building itself and take it with me. Yep, that's right folks, I'm MOVING! Moving down to good ole' AZ. Yes, I'm excited. Yes, I'm nervous. Yes, it's going to be dang hard and yes, I will survive.

Arizona state flag...

I decided to take a leap of faith and go forward with my decision to move down to Arizona after living here in Provo for most of my life. I have loved it! I've been close to my family. I see my parents pretty much every day because among other things, they feed me. I have been working at the best elementary school in the whole world. I have so many great friends who love me and my craziness. But, that is all going to CHANGE.

I wouldn't say I'm a huge fan of change, but that is what makes people stronger and keeps people alive. I know I've made the right decision. I know it is the Lord's will that I make this change and I'm not sure what's ahead of me, but I know that whatever happens is for a reason.

So everyone wish me some darn luck. I'll keep you posted as life away from life as I know it takes a turn for the better! AND, don't worry I'm still so seriously single, which means I am totally going to find myself a man down there in those Arizona parts.

One of the Funniest Emails I've Ever Read.

2010-04-12T19:57:00.000-07:00

P.S. This is about PMS.

Ok, so I got this email from my mom about a year ago and it is just so dang funny, I had to post it on my blog. Happy Reading! And, if "Aunt Flo" is visiting right now, this might make you feel a little better.

This is an actual letter from an Austin, Texas woman sent to Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. It's PC Magazine's 2007 editors' choice for best webmail-award-winning letter.

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer's monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'

Are you [freaking] kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house
just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of [Pete], pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending [bullcrap]. And that's a promise I will keep.

Always. . .

Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin , TX

I'm loving my Christmas Break!

2009-12-27T21:52:00.000-08:00

So, anyways...The first few days of my Christmas break were CRAZY! I did all my Christmas shopping in one day (a 9-hour shopping spree - can I say gold medal?! Yes, I can!!), got together with my best gal friends, woke up at 3:30 in the morning to take a friend to the airport... Just a few of the things to start off my Christmas break. I must admit that I was late getting into the Christmas spirit this year. Depressing. But, I really got in the mood fast! Christmas eve and Christmas were awesome! What I love most is being with my family. I am so blessed to have such an awesome family and great friends. These two things make me so happy and I rarely remember that I'm still single!! But, I must say that every Christmas I think, "Hm. I'm still single. It would be nice to have a significant other during this lovely holiday season...maybe next year - especially New Years Eve. Boy oh boy would I love a kiss at midnight!" (Anyone else think like that?!) I feel a bit of disappointment, but then I remember the true meaning of Christmas!

Speaking of the true meaning of Christmas...tonight at family dinner, my nephew Ty (4 years old) said about my niece Taylor (4), "I don't like Taylor." My other nephew Jonah (4) replied, "Ty, that's not the true spirit of Christmas." Jonah doesn't talk that much and usually just copies his trouble-maker older brother Seth, so we all thought his statement was pretty profound.

Last week in church, a member of my stake presidency told of a single woman in her mid-forties who had told his wife a great story. Every time she feels a pity party coming on, she just remembers how blessed she is to have the gospel in her life and she is filled with much happiness. I totally agree with her! I try not to have pity parties, but sometimes they just come on every few months. But, then I remember how blessed I am to have such a wonderful life because of the gospel of Jesus Christ. It is so wonderful! Would I rather be married without the gospel?! Heck no. HECK NO!

So, true, I won't get a kiss on New Years Eve, but guess what?! I totally reached almost all of my New Years resolutions! Good luck to everyone who will be making and working toward those. Just remember to make them resonably reachable! Merry Christmas!!

Funny Thanksgiving Stuff from my Students.

2009-11-24T14:54:00.000-08:00

I teach 3rd grade and this is what some of their "I am thankful for" papers said:

"I am thankful for love, food, and god for blessing us. Love for everybody won't be so mean and stuff. Food for giving us the taste and the juice. And all the stuff that help us."

"I am thankful for my family because they support me in doing things."

"I am thankful for my family because they give me shelter and clothes and food and sometimes even dogs or cats."

"I am thankful for my toys because if I didn't have toys it would be a boring life."

"I am thankful for my family because without a family we could not take care of our self and we would die."

The assistant principal at our school just got engaged in front of the whole school and this is what one of my students wrote:

"I am thankful that Ms. Boswell is going to get married because we won't have to call her Ms. Boswell."

You didn't graduate with your MRS degree?!

2009-11-18T13:05:00.000-08:00

Like, I totally tried to get my MRS degree in college, but it just didn't work out. So, I got a real degree.

I've been in my profession for about 2 1/2 years. Graduating from college and being in the real world is kind of a challenge! My whole life I've had a goal to work towards. In high school I was working to graduate from high school and knew I would go to college. In college I knew I would work to get my bachelors degree, which was elementary education, and then start teaching. I hoped or planned that if I didn't get married in college, I would just start my profession. But, I never thought about what I would do if I didn't get married during college. So, now I'm graduated and have always been slightly unsure of where I should go from here. Working is great and I love my job, but I feel a need to be working toward something. First, I decided to go through the temple and that has really enriched my life spiritually. But, I would also like to work toward goals mentally and physically.

So, I've thought a lot about going back to school to get a masters degree. Not necessarily to move up in my profession, but to just get more education. Step 1: I took the GRE. SCARY! I started with the prep course and then about 3 months later finally decided to schedule a time to take and about 2 months later actually took the test!! I didn't do so well with studying for it, but I actually did pretty well and was able to get the scores I wanted to get. Now, luckily, I don't have to retake the test!

Now, I have to start thinking about which masters degree I'd like to do. Then, I have to decide which schools I want to apply to. Boy oh boy is this super stressful for me because I do not like change. Plus, my whole family is right around where I live, so the big question is: Do I leave my job and where I live and find another job so I can go to school away? This question has caused me way to much anxiety. So, I pretty much don't think about it.

Right now, I'm just pleased that I'm working on my goals and trying to make my life the best it can be with or without a man! For your singles out there, education might not be your best option, but I strongly suggest working toward things that can refine your life and give it as much meaning as possible. Who knows what the future will be... But, I know that Heavenly Father will bless us if we're trying our hardest to be the best we can be and having a positive attitude while we do it.

If you like it...well, then you should have put a ring on it.

2009-09-26T16:06:00.000-07:00

It's a good song. That's why I put it on this lovely blog's playlist. So, if you think about it, think about the deeper meaning of the song, it has a good message. Like, if you like me, you can't just have me, you have to marry me first. That's the way I see it. The part about having drink in her cup and acting up. The drink is probably just water because that's good for you. And the acting up part is just all about, you know, acting like she's so happy because she's single even though she might not be because she's single. So, that's my review of my theme song that I probably have in my head about 50% of the time. That's a big chunk of my time.

C-H-O-C-O-L-A-T-E

2009-09-19T20:24:00.000-07:00

I LOVE FOOD. Sometimes as a single woman, I just need some good chocolate. So do un-single women. But, since I don't have a man, I may replace that emptiness with chocolate. Mwahahahaha! Ok, so I just can't get out of my head how very amazing Chili's Chocolate Molten Cake tastes in my mouth. It's like a party in my mouth...like a burst of goodness and gooeyness and warmth that just melts my heart. Anywho...I decided to try to find the recipe and it's so dang easy I just have to try it ASAP this next week. Here's the recipe if ya'll want to try it (I found it at this website: http://www.recipesecrets.net/forums/recipe-exchange/23906-chilis-molten-chocolate-cake.html). Enjoy the gooey goodness!!

Chili's® Molten Chocolate Cake

INGREDIENTS:
Cake
1 18.25-ounce box chocolate fudge or dark chocolate cake mix
1 1/3 cups water
1/2 cup vegetable oil
3 eggs

1 bottle Hershey hot fudge topping
8 scoops vanilla ice cream
Smucker's Magic Shell chocolate topping

1. Make cake batter 'following directions on the box and pour 1/2 cup of batter into the greased cups of a large (Texas size, muffin pan. If your pan has six cups, bake the cakes in two batches of 4 cakes each. Turn all of the cakes out of the pan and let them cool.

2. The cakes will be served upside down, so you may have to slice a bit of the domed top off the cakes to help them lay flat when inverted.A serrated sandwich knife works best for this. After you've flipped over all of the cooled cakes, use a sharp paring knife to cut out a 1 1/2-inch diameter cylindrical chunk in the center of the bottom (now the top) of each cake. The hole should be about 1 1/2-inches deep. After slicing straight down into the cake in a circle, scoop out the chunk of cake with a teaspoon and discard the piece. Now you have a secret compartment to conceal the hot fudge payload.

3. Spoon about 2 tablespoons of fudge into each of the holes you've made in the cakes, then store the cakes in a sealed container in the refrigerator.

4. When you are ready to serve, heat one cake at a time in the microwave for 40 to 45 seconds on high, or until you see the fudge begin to bubble. Remove the cake from the microwave and let it rest for 30 seconds or so, then place a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top of the cake. Pour a coating of Magic Shell chocolate topping over the ice cream and serve.

Makes 8 desserts

Catle Call from mi cousino...

2009-09-19T20:22:00.000-07:00

They should name every first Sunday of a new semester in Single wards “Cattle Call Sunday”. You’ve got your buyers sitting on the bleachers taking notes as the herd of cattle walk through the gates mooing at nothing in particular. Occasionally you’ll have a cow already being led by an owner to show the buyers that that particular cow ain’t for sale. And the cow crap. It’s everywhere. Smothered on the cows’ faces, clipped to their ears, dangling from their necks, growing from their heads. And don’t even get me started on those crisping pins and girdles. It was almost an utter waste of time (just had to get that in somehow).

Ladies keeping other ladies single...

2009-09-11T12:21:00.000-07:00

My cousin emailed me this funny story...

These kind of girls keep me single:
Tonight a guy came into our apartment advertising something and the conversation soon led to dating. He then said "Girls, I have an honest question for you. Do you think it's wrong when a guy asks a girl out just because she's cute? Because I've heard a lot of girls who are sick of being asked out on dates just for being cute. They want the guys to ask them out because they know them and want to go out with more than just a cute girl".

I said, can you show me where these girls are so I can precede to punch them? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

Honestly, aren't most relationships started on the foundation of attraction? And isn't the purpose of dating to get to know someone? Or maybe I'm just complaining because I don't get a ton of dates purely on the basis that I'm "cute".

Agree? Disagree? "

"Reading is a choice of delite"

2009-09-10T15:20:00.000-07:00

So, children are funny. It's true. Most of the time. I teach 3rd grade and my little children designed bookmarks from which I will choose the top three. Well, they are all cute. Apparently I didn't really give good enough instructions to make a bookmark having something to do with reading because many of them had nothing to do with reading. A lot of them had USA symbols like the liberty bell and bald eagle. Totally random. We hadn't even discussed USA symbols, yet. Another student had written, "What's cooking good looking?" That speaks for itself.

But, luckily, some of the students did follow my instructions because one is colored with lovely bright colors with the saying, "Reading is a choice of Delite." I love it. I think this gal will get the #1 spot for sure. I'll try to take a picture and post it on here.

By the way, this has a lot to do with being single because we should all be reading! Right now I'm trying to finish Eragon. It's a great book so far but it's just taking me so long to just finish it! One of my cousins, Elissa is a super fast reader and can pretty much read any book within a couple hours. For me, it's a couple weeks. But, I do love reading!

I'm really into young adult and children novels because they are so light-hearted and hardly ever have any suggestive material. So, if you want any great suggestions for good books, here's some:

Goose Girl by Shannon Hale
Princess Academy by Shannon Hale
Austenland by Shannon Hale (this is more young-adult than the others)
The Fablehaven series by Brandon Mull
Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine (so much better than the movie!)

I really want to re-read the Twilight series, but it just makes me really want a boyfriend. So, I might have to hold off on those for now.

AMEN brother! Brother, Amen!

2009-09-07T12:15:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, I had a great sabbath. It was fast Sunday and I was really looking forward to testimony meeting. My bishopric is really great at not beating the whole "Ya'll need to date!" thing. So, when they do talk about it, everyone is a lot more open to hear it.

My bishop bore his testimony first and started by saying that we need to not live by fear. He also said that a lot of the decisions we make in our lives will soon be irrelevant and we'll look back in our lives and realize that very thing. Then, he just encouraged everyone to be friendly and attend all the ward activities. He ended by encouraging the men to date to get to know girls and that it really was the best way to make friends and get to know people. It was a really great testimony and I really enjoyed it!

When you hear guys bear their testimony about dating, they're usually engaged or newly married. But, a brother stood up in my ward who wasn't either of those "things" and bore his testimony of following our leaders counsel to date. I don't think I've EVER heard a guy get up to bear testimony of dating like he did. It was so great! He told of all the amazing ways your life can be blessed just by following the counsel to date. He said that prayers were answered that he didn't even think would be and that he'd grown so much closer to the Lord.

I was really touched because I've never thought of dating in that light. Yes we date to get to know people and to find a man, but um, we need to follow what our leaders tell us to do and, apparently from what this young man said, we will be blessed in many ways! I think this applies to the ladies and the gents. But, especially the gents.

Cute Little Kiddos...

2009-09-07T12:14:00.001-07:00

My brother blessed his baby in church yesterday. After the blessing, as he was holding up his cute baby daughter, his older daughters stood up on the pew and starting clapping and cheering. It was so funny. And what was funnier is that no one tried to quiet them. It was the most exciting post-blessing congrats I've ever witnessed.